Thoughts and Musings on Faith, Music, Family, Life

Hey, we're all friends here...

Don't usually blog more than once a day, but had to pass this along.

My lovely town of Mount Airy (a.k.a. Mayberry) is one of six finalists in the running for the "Friendliest City in America," in a contest sponsored by Rand McNally and USA Today.  This past weekend, Jason and Nikki Wynn came to check us out.  As you'll see from the video, they got a royal treatment and a pretty good sampling of what life in our town is like.  You may also recognize a gigging pastor briefly playing a Jack Johnson tune at the 6:40 mark ;-)

Thanks to Mayor Deborah Cochran and all the folks who helped make their stay an enjoyable one. The winner will be announced sometime in July - keep your fingers crossed!

Best of the Road Mt. Airy NC from Gone With the Wynns on Vimeo.

Seeing Jesus

There was a big brouhaha the other day about some folks in the eastern part of the Old North State who claimed to see the likeness of Jesus in some kudzu hanging off a utility pole.  All the local networks jumped on the story, which if nothing else goes to show that it must be a pretty slow news month.

I mean, I guess it looks like Jesus, if anything that's shaped in the form of the cross looks like Jesus.  It certainly doesn't stand out to me as much as some other random Jesus sightings in the past - like a piece of toast, a frying pan, chicken feathers, an underpass in Chicago, clouds (okay, that's not such a big deal), a hospital door, a candle bottle, a cotton ball, a ketchup bottle lid, a reflection on a wall, a dog's butt (no picture here; you can google it if you want, but beware, it ain't pretty), a Kit Kat candy bar, on Mars, an MRI, a chicken breast, a maple leaf, a potato chip, a grilled cheese sandwich (this is actually the Virgin Mary), an iron, a pancake, and my personal favorite: a Cheeto (better known as "Cheesus").

I'm not one to get terribly excited over stuff like this.  As a psychology major in college, I know the power of pattern recognition.  But who am I to argue with a person's vantage point?  Besides, if something they see or experience uplifts them in their walk of faith, so be it.

Still, I can't help but feel a little melancholy when people see Jesus in stuff like this.  Because where I really wish we'd all do a better job of seeing him are in things like this:

Just sayin.'

 

 

New Coke and the gender-neutral craze

Is it dating me to say that I remember when New Coke came out?  Probably so. I'm finding that happens more and more each day.

There was a big hubbub about it.  Apparently Coke had decided that it needed a little boost in sales; stiff competition from other soft drink companies were eating into their profits.  So they came up with a plan: create an entirely new formula for Coke.

Only one problem - it didn't taste good. Oops. The public response was swift and brutal, and pretty unanimous.  Coke heard it loud and clear, and within a year it reinstituted the old formula with the nebulous Coke Classic.  Lesson learned: sometimes the problem is not with the product itself but with the way you deal with it.

I know it probably seems like an odd segue to transition from a failed soft drink to the current stories about families and schools going all gender-neutral.  Then again, there isn't a real smooth way to broach the subject.  Even I, one who is rarely at a loss for words, have struggled a bit.  I almost blogged about it when I read this article in our local paper a month or so ago; about the couple in Toronto who was attempting to hide their child's gender from everyone so as to avoid the ill effects of stereotypes.  But it was right on the heels of my post regarding our denomination's change in ordination standards, and while gender issues are not the same as gay/lesbian matters, it would've probably been one too many blogs in the "human sexuality" department.

Then yesterday, I opened the paper to see this - a preschool in Sweden which is making a concentrated effort to de-genderize all their students in an attempt to avoid stereotypes.  Children are dressed in nonescript clothing and teachers are asked to refer to students not as "boys" or "girls" but "friends."  Like the Toronto parents, a child's sexual identity is kept secret, or at the very least attention is not drawn to it.  Classroom items like books and toys are carefully selected and situated to prevent the kids from falling into classic male/female stereotypes.

I'm torn on this issue, but only slightly.  On one level I salute the school for recognizing the dangers of gender stereotypes and attempting to do something about it at an early age.  I applaud the Toronto couple for recognizing that, as parents, they play a primary role in making sure that their child's gender should serve to enrich their child's life, not hinder it. 

But, like New Coke, it seems to me that they're going about it the wrong way.  Forcing children to operate in a gender-neutral environment or hiding a child's gender as some deep dark secret is not the answer.  In fact, it could wind up doing more harm than good.  Because what that essentially teaches our kids is that gender is, at best, something to be minimized or done away with; and at worst something to be ashamed of or feared.  We should be encouraging children and adults to embrace all aspects of who they are, not shrink from them.

Gender bias and stereotypes are a real and complicated problem in our society.  But here's the thing: the kids aren't the problem.  We are.  We grown-ups, we as a society.  We're the ones who routinely pay male CEO's more than female CEO's.  We're the ones who have failed to create an atmosphere that encourages more men to teach in our primary schools.  We're the ones who've said that girls can't play football or boys shouldn't dance.  It's we who need to get over the gender stereotypes and how we inadvertently force them on our children.

That's why creating gender-neutral schools or hiding our child's gender from society amounts to a cop-out on our part, really.  They do little to help our children face and overcome the issues of gender-bias. Instead of changing the way we directly and indirectly treat boys and girls differently in the larger society, we make the kids bear the burden.  And I think that's pretty lame on our part.  As one anti-gender neutral school person in Sweden so aptly put it, "Different gender roles aren't problematic as long as they are equally valued."

We didn't need New Coke.  And we don't need gender-neutral schools or gender-neutral parenting.  What we need are better efforts to appreciate and embrace who we are and make sure that society as a whole treats everyone equally.  What do you think?

I am the proud father of a dancer.

I always dreamed of being a Dad. I grew up with a great one, so I wanted to be one, too.  I imagined myself celebrating Father's Day, not just as a son but as a father myself.  That's exactly what I did yesterday, as I've done for the past eight years.

But I'll be honest - I never imagined myself enjoying it at a dance recital.

When our 8-year old son asked us a year ago if he could take dance, my wife and I were happy to oblige.  Putting aside all the stereotypical assumptions of what boys are supposed to do - usually involving a sport with some kind of ball - we signed him up for hip-hop class.  Every Thursday night this school year he's been there, learning his moves.  If he was bothered by the fact that he was one of two boys in a class of fifteen or so, and one of three boys in an entire dance program of close to 150 kids, he never showed it.

For the past few weeks he's been brushing up on the dance at home, getting prepped for Sunday's recital.  I had heard for years about this event.  In the past, when a swath of young girls in our church took dance, this Sunday - almost always Father's Day - was the lowest-attended Sunday of the year.  That's because kids and parents have to be at the Stevens Center in Winston-Salem at 9am.  For a 6pm recital.  My wife took our son down yesterday morning for their marathon day, while his younger brother and I did the church thing.  Grandparents and an uncle joined us for the show. 

The recital is a bit of a test in endurance; but then again, if you don't have a kid, grandkid, niece/nephew or good friend in the show, you're probably not there anyway.  It was over two hours in length with a short intermission.  His dance was in the middle of the first act.  But, of course, there was the big finale at the end of the whole thing.  He was so proud of himself, and he did awesome.  They all did, really.

After the show we scooted across the street to the strategically-placed Mellow Mushroom Pizzeria, along with a bunch of other folks.  A number of people stopped by our booth and told our son what a great job he did.  He was beaming.  And so were we, to be honest.

What a tremendous way to spend Father's Day.

Yet another reason why I love this town.

Kudos to the Mount Airy Fire and Police Departments.

http://mtairynews.com/view/full_story/13887600/article-Little-boy-8217-s-big-dream-comes-true

Once I knew what I was looking for, I found it

Today was our Youth Sunday service.  This is where the youth of our church conduct and lead pretty much every aspect of Sunday morning worship.  There may be an adult or two behind the scenes doing something, but for the most part the youth run with it.  Without fail, it's always an amazing worship experience.  It's one of the very few times I fear for my job security.

But something was up this morning.  Something was afoot.  And I couldn't put my finger on it.  It's just that folks were acting strange around me.  I sat with the youth and adult advisors running through things in the sanctuary early in the morning, just kind of hanging out; and I got this strange feeling that I wasn't wanted there.  I can pick up vibes like that.  So I went back to my office to look through the morning bulletin.  And that's when I was struck by the title for the anthem the kids were going to sing.  It looked pretty hifalutin' for a youth-led worship service:

"I ancora haven' la t ha trovato che I' ricerca di m."

French, perhaps?  I checked Google Translate.  No luck.  By that time the worship service was almost about to start, so I left the office and headed to the sanctuary to sit with my family (a rare treat).

Turns out it's Italian for "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" - a U2 classic.  That's what they were singing.  And while it fit in perfectly with their worship theme of having questions and doubts but remaining strong in the faith, they also did it as a surprise for me.   You don't have to know me very long to pick up on the fact that I'm a pretty big U2 fan.

They did great.  Apparently they had worked on it for weeks; with the help of some adults and our new music director.  All without me finding out.  You gotta like that.  There were about 25 of them singing and playing away.  It was priceless the way they smiled at me as the song began; as I made note of the familar chord progression and remembered the service theme and kind of put two and two together. 

What was really amazing was hearing our young people sing it.  As I mention in this previous blog post, contrary to initial impressions, this song is really a song of tremendous faith and belief, despite the title.  Or actually, because of the title.  We're faithful, we believe, but we're not satisfied.  There's still work to do.  We still haven't found what we're looking for.  To have our youth up there singing this was an amazing testimony.  It got some rare Presbyterian applause at the end.  And I wasn't the only one who found myself a little teary-eyed.

I encourage you to check out the entire worship service HERE.  At the very least, devote the next four minutes of your life to listening to our Beacons singing this song below.  Thanks, guys, for the surprise!  In so many ways, that is something you never fail to do.

Beacons "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by stevelindsley